A glimpse of sunlight

The chilly, autumnal, mornings are back and the evenings are getting dark earlier but I’m feeling much more like myself.

The break in Eindhoven did me the world of good. It was so nice to be in a place where no one knew me and I didn’t feel judged – now I know most of that is all in my head but I’m working on it. I’d forgotten how much I like exploring and how much I like meeting new people and finding out their stories.

The only downside of our trip was seeing Jono really struggling, he’s in so much pain these days and it’s heartbreaking to see. It’s given me the courage to speak out though. I’m going to talk to anyone who will listen so that Jono gets the treatment he needs.

The plans for the coffee morning are going really well. I will do a post about that soon to tell you more about it. I know people wonder how I can organise a coffee morning when I’m depressed. This part is the easy part, most of the organising is done behind a computer. The hard part will be on Monday but the brave face will go on and it’ll be OK.

See this is the thing about depression. People who haven’t experienced it tend to think that anyone suffering with mental health issues is sitting in the corner of a room, rocking backwards and forwards and crying. Believe me there are many days when I feel like doing just that but the mask goes on and I face the world.

This is why depression is one of the hidden illnesses, you see we look OK. We even speak like we are OK. Sometimes we even laugh. That doesn’t mean we are OK though. I suppose what I’m saying is don’t judge a book by the cover. I have good days and bad days but knowing that even if today isn’t good tomorrow might be better so there’s always hope.

Thanks for reading.